Security is one of the main issues of marriage. When couples do not meet each other’s expectation, it could cause a conflict or even divorce. It is for the fact that women are the always anxious one when it comes to security. The fear of not having stability is a huge deal.
Do women mature faster emotionally than men? Maybe. When women get married, they want to have an assurance that they will be well provided and that they would not have to deal with the stress of unpaid bills. They want to send their children to the best school, they want to be able to afford health care, and they want their family to live comfortably.
Why Security Causes Women To Be Anxious:
- Women Are Sensitive
You can say they have a big heart which easily breaks when they see their family not getting what she thinks they deserve. If a woman is always disappointed, she will eventually grow cold and frustrated about the things her family could not have, and she will take it all against her husband who should be fulfilling the family’s needs.
“Relationships in and of themselves do not create mental illness.” However, he adds, “When we suffer in our relationships, it can be difficult to move forward from past hurt and trauma.” –Jor-El Caraballo, LMHC
- Women Mature Emotionally Faster Than Men
For some reason, once a couple marries, men always have a hang-up. They tend to want to live as they have been, maybe enjoy a little bit more and have adventures with their wives before finally having a life. However, with women, it might be a bit different because women tend to have always thought about the life they want when they settle down.
- Women Know What They Want
They want security and stability, and often, they want it right away. It may not be literal as women have much patience, but they set an ultimatum which they may or may not disclose to their husbands. When they reach this point, and they still feel unstable, they may get frustrated and burned out, causing their unexplainable moods.
“People who have difficulty saying no are often people pleasers and are trying to make too many people happy,” says Drenner. “Over time they become over-extended and exhausted and their self-esteem is eroded, because no matter how hard they try to please others, they can never do enough.” -Counselor Monte Drenner
- Women Have More Needs Than Men
Society nowadays demands more from women. Social media dictates all their needs, and as emotional beings, they get easily trapped and confused between wants and necessities. Somehow, their desires become needs, and not being able to get them is a threat to emotional stability.
- Women Are Proud
Men have an ego, and women have pride that’s why they fit together. Ego is the feeling of worthiness and fulfillment of one’s identity while pride is the feeling of pleasure from accomplishments and possessions. It doesn’t necessarily make them a materialist but more of an idealist. They are sensitive, and they care about what others think, especially their parents. They want to feel proud of their husbands and the life they chose.
“This is what it boils down to and it extrapolates to any social situation, It can be specific to certain social situations, it can be generalized to all social situations, but the anxiety is about judgement, and ultimately not being approved of and not being liked.” – Alicia H. Clark, Psy.D.
Women are anxious about security, and they should be. Everyone deserves it. However, when men could not give it instantly, they should not falter and ask for a divorce. It is somewhat cruel not to give men a chance especially when they are putting much effort. Women should provide moral support, and they should be able to distinguish between the lack of action and lack of opportunity.