It’s not unheard of for either the bride or groom to get cold feet before the wedding. Some pre-wedding anxiety is perfectly normal and natural, as virtually everyone experiences such anxiety to one degree or another. – John M. Grohol, Psy.D.
Some people have “cold feet” about the idea of committing for life through a sacred bond called marriage. They may be afraid of getting a lifetime commitment; nonetheless, they can have romantic relationships. It may be described by those who have gamophobia that their fear of marriage is parallel to the fear of dying. People having this type of phobia either remain spinsters, bachelors or committed to a single partner for the rest of their life.
Fear of commitment also happens within relationships where one or both partners hold back, refuse to give themselves fully, always wearing their protective shields. What an uncomfortable place to be, I think. What a lonely, empty space. Sure, being vulnerable is scary but there is relief in finally letting your guard down. – Moushumi Ghose MFT.
The term “gamophobia” is derived from the two Greek words, gamos, which means marriage, and phobos, meaning fear. It is a severe type of phobia, but ironically, it is not listed by the American Psychological Association in their official recognized 100 phobias. People who have gamophobia may find difficulty in conquering their irrational fear which leads them to give up and allows their phobia to control their lives.
They must not lose hope because if it is managed in the right way, gamophobia can be overcome. The following are some of the productive and practical strategies that can reclaim the lives of those suffering from this type of phobia.
Face Your Fear
People suffering from gamophobia must realize that they are not the only one in this kind of battle and there is nothing to be embarrassed. A gradual building up of one’s exposure is the answer for this strategy to be most effective. First, identify that very thing that creates one’s gamophobia. Statistics reveal that men are more prevalent in having gamophobia. The reasons are linked to personal insecurity, a personal history of bad marriage in the family or own parents, fear of handling major responsibilities like rearing children and the adjacent financial obligations. Once known, the person can be subjected to several therapies that can help treat gamophobia. This will include cognitive-behavioral therapy, exposure therapy, family therapy, and medications to treat physical symptoms.
Never Let Your Fear Paralyze You
For a person to move forward in combating gamophobia, is not allowing the setbacks to debilitate them. If a person feels no progress within a specified period, one must pause for a while and look on how they are progressing. Honesty to one’s self makes a person see some real results. After all, it is the person with gamophobia that can help himself most.
Look For Possible Opportunities
If a person has a big-picture perspective on the things that will happen if gamophobia is defeated, it will give him the endurance and courage to try overcoming the said condition. Or maybe a person may realize the opportunities he will lose if ever gamophobia still control their daily lives. They must not live with regrets after it is already too late.
Reframe The Notion Of Your Fear Of Marriage
Sometimes, one’s mindset is critical in battling specific phobias. One must not let this type of phobia live within himself and continue crippling to his personality. Instead, a person must consider it as a wake-up call or a motivation that must be taken into action. Writing down a list of the plan to be carried out is recommended.
Rewire Your Brain
A person with gamophobia must develop the courage that is important for him in getting to where he wants to go. Professional assistance can be a big help but may result in spending a lot of money. However, there are affordable alternatives such as hypnotherapy, which according to those receiving it, permanently erases gamophobia from their brain. “Hypnotism puts you into a state of “focused concentration,” during which you’re vaguely aware of your surroundings — you just don’t care about them. There are different stages of hypnosis, some deeper than others. But when you’re in any of them, your imagination is open to suggestion,” says Lynn Ponton, MD.
It can be done in a clinic or even in the comfort and convenience of one’s home.